Nina vs The World

Well, I wish I had a more cheerful topic to ramble about as my first belated post of the year; but given as the weather has been anything but normal and the level of craziness has skyrocketed in my universe lately, you get what you get, and you probably will get upset. I've been contemplating a lot lately; (I always do when the world around me ceases to be a place of amazement and wonder) drawing inwardly to reflect on life again and the crazy paths it takes us on, willing or not. I wonder to myself: What if aging is just a disposition of the mind? It seems the older we get, the more negative our outlook becomes, and the grimmer reality becomes. If we boil down aging to its nitty gritty: I truly believe we'd find pessimism and dissatisfaction in its basic form. When we are children, most of us share a delusion of the world being bright and inviting; our "oyster" per se. As we grow older and run into concrete wall obstacles that are belittling and unrelenting; ou...

Well it's safe to say the year is practically over. Sure, we still have about 35 odd hours in which some global catastrophe can still happen, such as Miley Cyrus twerking up a storm for New Years. But for the most part, we've had more than a general idea of what the year was about. And may I say, I am Not Impressed. <Insert Makayla Meme> Between the garden variety of school shootings and bombings, the world is becoming a less and less wonderful neighborhood to live in. Sure we can talk about medical advances, charity water, and all sorts of movements to bring food to Syrians and everyone else caught in crossfire. But at the end of the day, the issues ranging from debt ceiling and medical insurance for all, to famine and crime- have only gotten murkier and more complex. Not that 2014 deserves to be written off before having started; but we also can't throw all of everything that's wrong on a symbolic time-keeping concept and hope for it to magically sort itse...

"Accept what is let go of what was and have faith in what will be.." (Anonymous)         You know, I don't normally share these kind of maxims here and there, because I think most of them are cheesy. In my opinion, they are created to be generic sugar-truths to make people feel better about embarrassing pasts. (Yes, we know what you did last summer..) But in all sincerity, I really liked this little nugget of realization/coping mechanism that someone passed on to me after hearing of a rough day I went through.         I'd like to add to this maxim though. Accepting, letting go, and having faith are all good pointers, but too vague. Accepting what? The things we can't change? Letting go of what was.. well, that's pretty straightforward. But having faith.. well, in what? For how long? In reality I truly believe you need to take a slightly more proactive look at life. As an intuitive feeler/thinker, I can get lost in my own maze of thou...

In case the subtle pictures above didn't get the point across.. I am celebrating my three year blogging anniversary!! Yay! That's right. My blog has now been alive and kicking longer than most celebrity marriages. It has survived Hurricane Sandy, the Faux Rapture , The End of the World,  the controversial "death" of Osama the death of Gaddhafi, a couple bad haircuts, and even the Government Shutdown. So I guess I'm here to stay. Until I am kicked off the internet or come down with a new strand of swine flu. For the last time, GET THAT FLU SHOT AWAY FROM ME! Anywho. I guess its the time of year to get reflective on the past and prance on the soapbox about how my life has been a voyage and how much I've grown, and blah blah blah.. But really I don't want to do that this year. I just want to say THANKS . I don't make money from this little blog here, but I get a lot of great feedback from friends and strangers. As an extrovert that places high ...

I'm going to start off this post by saying to my dear friends, I'm okay. Maybe even good. I know a few of you worried after yesterday's atypical somber post. But sometimes you have write through the rut you're in to come out to the sunlight on the other side. After a tough day, or week, or month.. it's nice to have a little respite and feel optimistic again. Granted, it may not be sunshine yet, but it's not rain. It's funny because my situation yesterday and my situation today are at face value, exactly the same. I haven't had some quintessential revelation or hit the lottery. (Not that I would ever want to deal with all that unasked for limelight) Yet today I have a better outlook. I don't know. Maybe it's because I got a good night's sleep. And all the support and love from friends helped to save the day, too. In any case, I am ready to get over myself and get back to mocking other people and things. (You knew it wouldn't be much lo...

Life is full of little surprises. And bigger surprises. And colossal surprises that take the wind out of your sails and leave you scrambling to get up in the dust. No.. this is not one of those "pity me please", posts. Everyone has it rough in life somehow. Yet we dust ourselves off and carry on because.. well why, exactly? If life is so complicated and so little reward is returned, why do we carry on? We carry on because no one wants to die. We carry on because others depend on us. We carry on because there is a shred of hope in us somewhere, perhaps beat up or shriveled up, abandoned in a corner but not ultimately forgotten. We carry on because its the only thing we can do. In a way life is like a governess. A stern, and unforgiving governess. She humbles you constantly and reminds you of your puny limitations. She smirks at you when you feel bliss because she knows what's coming for you around the corner. And she hands you life lessons served cold, when you weren...

I know I can't be alone on this boat. I know I am not the only one that has tried for years to forget a certain event, a certain person, a certain circumstance.. and yet despite all that trying; find themselves staring at a memory embossed in the soul. Etched in eyelids of the heart. Forever branded in your mind. Why is it that things I want to remember- deep conversations with friends that reveal the trenches of their being and the make up of their persona, words of comfort and direction that will light the path you saunter, pleasant memories that make your heart swell, etc- are all held captive in the foggy room in your brain that shrinks and swallows these moments away forever? Geez, it's an uphill battle for me to even remember what I had for lunch yesterday, but when it comes to one topic in particular.. it's almost instantaneous. Effortless. Like blinking. And all of a sudden.. there it is, in all its glory. Every hue in the spectrum vivid, the reflection of sunli...