Nina vs The World

So, this weekend I had the joy of running into one of my regular blog readers and had a bittersweet chat with him. Why? Because he looks at me, and out of the blue, with smug tranquility, and in a moment of reverse peristalsis, quips the following: "Hey Nina. I just always wanted to tell you how I think its cool that although no one likes the stuff you write , you keep writing it!" For once, I was speechless, in an effort to understand idiot.. and that's saying a lot when I'm constantly surrounded by them. I looked at him from my lemonade, slanted my eyes, and quickly analyzed the five most effective ways to kill someone with a styrofoam cup. Before I could execute my action, however,  someone else piped up saying, "Basically what he means is, You're horrible at writing, I don't even know why you try, but I still read it." Immediately fellow #1 tried to rephrase his statement, but it was too late. What kind of response was he expecting? ...

What's up with today's football players? When did they get so fat? Is football the American version of sumo wrestling with cool helmets? Did they eat the football? When they're not on the field, they must be getting open heart bypass surgery. Seriously. South Beach Diet anybody? Two things you should never tell people. 1) Wow, you're photogenic ! Which basically means, "Wow, for a minute there I actually thought you had a decent face!" and B) You look better in person. Which technically means, "I was taken aback by your digital appearance, but its relieving to see you're really not that aesthetically repulsive in the flesh." Both are classic backhand compliments and just two examples of things that should never leave your twisted mind.  Photoshop Strikes Again!