Nina vs The World

Let's put it this way. You've never been a fan of vegetables. The very thought of asparagus makes you cringe. If you were stranded on an island that thrived on veggies, you'd consider the alternate venue of allowing your gastric acids to consume your stomach lining. But one day as you sit there munching a cookie, a commercial airs where a gorgeous blond holds a bright orange crunchy wet carrot. She bites it- making the most fun acoustic crunches in sync with one of those ambient underground hippy-ish sound tracks. You know, the ones that only sound good in lays and hp commercials that last thirty seconds. Your mouth has begun to water. You lay down the cookie and walk into the light ...of the fridge. You are now a believer. It sounds goofy, but everyday companies spend millions advertising their product. The result? They have your average consumer yearning for a vast array of objects, from the newest ifail to campbells soup. Usually were quick to catch on when publicit...

Are you tired of driving to church on Sundays just so you can tell the priest you've been getting jiggy lately?  Are you done with having to write your sins down, or trying to keep them under five per week so you can remember them?  Well transgress no more.  Apple now offers a new Catholic app.. CONFESSION! For a reasonable price now all you have to do is type your shortcomings and scantiness on the privacy of your Iphone. No face to face embarrassment, no wasted gas, and the same equal pardon opportunity- whether you cursed or poisoned your mother in law.  You can read about it here. What other apps will the Catholic church profit- er I mean, take use of?  Presenting the new.. IBaptized App! With this fancy application, you recite your creeds and knowledge, press a button, and use the phone's squirt power to commence your solid relationship with the Higher One. For a one time price of $9.99, now you too can become one with the Holy Spirit!

I've had with hormonal dropouts, teenage whack jobs, and overall idiots. It's bad enough I have to share a world with these oxygen-hoggers, but its worse when the air bubble is constricted to a stuffy classroom. This blog is dedicated to the pot heads I unfortunately have to brush shoulders with while I try to get school out of the way. Dear Classmate, Life hasn't been easy for you. I get it. Your parents did a half-butt job because they didn't care. They were too busy cheating on each other or getting so far wasted they could forget about your existence, a page in the book of mistakes they can't undo. Too harsh? Sorry. Not mistakes, boo boos. Now, through Murphy's law, my frenemy chance, and my own procrastination, you and I are in the same class. And by class, I'm "scientifically" referring to Mammalia, Order Primates. I went on to be "Homo-Sapien". You went on to be a mix between obnoxious monkey and stupid. I take that back. Monkey...