Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Nina vs Undercover World

What is that makes the life of spies so alluring that the entertainment world always promotes it? Is it the fact that death escapades make up their daily bread? The fact they have subsequent lives, parallel lives, alter egos, aliases, and a whole set of nine lives?

Of course, I am just basing my accurate notions on reading "The Athena Project" and watching The Tourist. But for mostly everyone, it must be riveting to lead a seemingly shadow less life and be "off the radar." Now let's be real. How many real spies do you know in person? What's that you say? That would defeat the purpose? That's no excuse. If you want a bunch of hoodlums after you for no apparent reason, you can just set up camp in New Haven. No need to go to the government for that.

What knocks me off my rocker, (yes, I really did just use that expression and I can feel my popularity plummeting) is that in every spy movie, the main character doesn't die, the "bad" guys do, no matter how fast the chasee runs and how many alleys they turn to, the chaser finds them in 2.5 seconds after being held up, falling over and possibly running into a conveniently placed wall/street kiosk/old lady. Two car/boat/plane/helicopter/scooter chases later, and all of a sudden the spy disappears. Come on! At least follow some physical law.

In fact, my conspiracy theory is that spies may just die so quickly that movies are supposed to encourage people to want to be spies to recruit new gullible losers with a desire for danger. If I happen to "choke" on a "piece of pie" or "forget to take meds", you guys know what happened. ;P

Anyhow. If I was a spy, my name would be.. Nincognito 0021. But.. I guess now I wouldn't be so undercover. Or am I?. ;)

 I don't believe in violence, so I've taken the liberty of replacing the sniper with a kid from my neighborhood holding laughing gas. Oh, and I'm not killing anyone. I respect life.


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