Monday, October 18, 2010

The Hi-Res Challenged

We all have them on our friend list on Facebook. We have all seen them on other friend's lists. We've seen, admired, clicked, and gasped. Yikes. Definitely looked better in a thumbnail.

That's right. This blog is dedicated to the Hi-Resolution Challenged, the Pixelated Pretty, and the altogether Thumbnail Fabulous. Here's a rant, just for them.


Dear Visually Awkward Person,


Life hasn't been easy for you, but now, you have a lot of appreciating to do. When at one point people would stare and laugh in your face, now they just have to click and giggle. And you won't hear a thing.

I see you carefully positioned yourself in clever lighting, caked yourself with pounds of makeup and held the camera at an odd to decipher angle while you took and erased 342 pictures. But let's face it. Number 343 isn't any better. And while thumbnails make you look semi decent, once we click your name, it's all over.

Right smack before our eyes lies the naked truth, in all its glory. Now we have two options, hurl into a paper bag, or quickly reboot the computer.

You think you're being clever.. but we all know you're only digitally lovely. The rest of your time is spent in the dark cold cave of your room hiding from humanity. Don't worry, it's only a matter of time before facial masks are created and accessible to aesthetically less fortunate. Meanwhile, keep counting your blessings and stop pasting that thing on your head you call a face all over the internet.

Thanks, glad we had this convo.

2 comments:

Vicki said...

Hm, very true, but I don't know what's worse; the "glamor shot" that promises something the real you can't deliver or the pic that leaves a lot to be desired lol

Ninfamous said...

They're both up there on the loser list. If you have to edit a picture more than five minutes for it to look "decent", it's time to embrace the truth. lol