Friday, January 28, 2011

Lady, Smack that Kid!

Nothing makes me angry faster than a squirming wriggling yelling brat on the floor. 

What the heck is wrong with parents today? What happened to the good old days, when parents just gave their kids laser beam looks that meant business? Or when they said, wait til we get home, and actually meant it? Nowadays little tots of two and three are sucker punching their parents and smacking right on the face with no consequence! 

When I was young.. (oh no, I've hit that dreaded age..) and I disrespected someone, whether directly or indirectly, my mom would give me a cold stare that was already punishment enough. And when we got home, my buttcheeks would be tasting the cold leather that came from my dad's belt. Did it hurt? Heck yes it stung. But five minutes later I was okay again, and I never disrespected someone on purpose again. 

Or how bout "I want it! I want it! I want it!!!" in the store and then whining and making a scene because you don't get what you want? I did that a grand total of once, in my entire life. Afterwards I was spanked with the holy belt of discipline and never again. 

The result? I'd like to think of myself as a productive, respectful, likeable individual. Learned from the crib, with me until the grave. My parents did an excellent job, and if I could turn back time, I would have suggested perhaps a couple more spankings here and there. Today I have great friends, and a lot less behavioral and sociological problems.

Today, little evil monsters not even three years of age control their parents completely, getting everything they want and demanding things their way. "They're only kids.." one might say. But they won't be kids forever! And when they blossom into teenagers you'll be pulling a trigger to your head. That's right. Here comes a gold nugget of wisdom. Wait for it....

You can't plant pea seeds and expect to reap roses

It just don't work that way, sonny. Kids need discipline. They actually want it, crazy at it may sound. Why do you think they continue acting out?  Humans need limits, need boundaries, need realistic laws to abide by. Its what makes us productive, efficient, responsible. What separates us from beasts and savages. Discipline is a demonstration of love- one the little bugger will appreciate when he grows up! Because trust me on this.. whether young or old, someone in their lifetime will assume that position if you don't. Except it won't be with love, and it will be a lot more painful. 

Try it, and ten years from now, you can thank me with a $5,000 check for each productive individual. 

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